sometimes i look in the mirror and i ask myself am i fit to do what god has charged me with/ i feel like i fail at so many things being a good bf, being a good son, being a good catholic, hell just being a good person. i wanna be good, but i feel like idk how to do that. i once thought that i could be a hero but i feel more like the villain. i want my child to look up to me, i want to be the father that i never had, but how do i do that when the mother of my child is always hurt because of something i did or failed to do and the only friend i had well is less than friendly with me. i just feel like i suck. not because i am feeling sorry for myself but because everybody around me who was close to me dislikes me. i have never really cared about how others feel about me. so why now/. why is it that i want a friend/ right now this particular evening the mother of my child is driving away and is pretty upset. but do i or can i make her feel better/ no i cant. i dont want to be the bad guy anymore.